We hope you enjoy this new, multi-installment virtual Farbrengen on the topic of peer pressure, presented by Chaya Mushka Kievman of Melbourne, Australia!

Part One, Section One:

Transcript of Part One, Section One:

As a teen, these two words mean a lot, so many of us can relate to it. The question is, how do we deal with it? How do we swim against the tide? There are so many factors that enable us to rise above the dictates of society, and really remain steadfast in what you believe in.  When you don’t give into peer pressure you’re showing your true loyalty to Yiddishkeit. ‘It’s one thing to keep Yiddishkeit when you’re free to, but when everyone around you isn’t keeping, even if it’s just a minor detail, and you’re the אחד היה אברהם that’s the treasure.

First and foremost is chinuch, the education you got from your parents. If you were ingrained enough during your childhood about what’s right and wrong, you will have good values that are set in place, so when teenagehood comes, your strong roots will prevent your strong tree from falling, even if the winds o peer pressure blow. A good relationship with your parents is also important. If you are close with them, then it’s harder for you to go against what they want you to do. Also, if the communication lines between your parents are open, then you know that they are there to discuss with you the various questions you have during those years, that you can ask them how to deal with peer pressure, you can discuss all the hashkafic questions that come up during these years. But what happens if this isn’t the case, and you’re already in your teenagehood, and for some reason or another you and your parents may just not be on the best terms? Or maybe you and your parents are close, but that’s not just enough to stand up against peer pressure?

Part One, Section Two:

Transcript of Part One, Section Two (Niggun Ufaratzta Lyrics):

Original Hebrew: וּפָרַצְתָּ יָמָּה וָקֵדְמָה וְצָפֹנָה וָנֶגְבָּה

Transliteration: Uforatztoh yamah vakedmah u’tzafonah vanegba.

Translation: And you shall spread forth to the west and to the east, To the north and to the south.  ~Genesis/Bereishis 28:14

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Part One, Section Three:

Transcript of Part One, Section Three:

That’s when you’ve got to do some soul-searching. You have to truly look inside and look into the Torah, the teachings of Chassidus, see what’s right and wrong, and know what’s right and wrong. And if it isn’t clear, you have to ask, you have to look; the Torah is endless.  Even after you search for answers and may not yet find, continue looking – you’re only at the halfway point.

Short and long-term effects are also to be taken in account. You know when you join the crowd to do something fun, but not necessarily right, how it only feels good while you did it, but afterwards you may regret it so much? On the other hand, if you don’t do the wrong thing, you may lose some trivial fun for a tiny bit of time; but, you’ll feel the satisfying feeling for a long time, knowing that you stuck to your principles and did what is right. Many teenagers feel that they want to give into peer pressure because they want to fit in, but the truth is that they won’t necessarily fit in for that.  On the contrary, people who know that you’re going against your values will notice it, and it won’t be cool. And the truth is, people will deep inside actually admire you for sticking to your principles, you’ll actually make them proud. You are forming the next link in the chain of נשים צדקניות. Do you want to really join that little trip or whatever it is that will be forgotten in a few minutes, or rather do the memorable, priceless thing – the right thing, in working on putting into practice the true values you have, and build inside of you a true Bas Melech, with every sacrifice you make? And truthfully, people will be proud of you for it. And Hashem will, the Rebbe will, and your parents will.  And you will.